Ten Things I will accomplish in 2012

1) Dance

Aside from writing, dance really was my first passion. I signed up for Jazz and Afro-Haitian at school and would love to sign up for ballet this semester too. I’ve always loved ballet, but the requirements to be a ballerina sucks… one look at me and already disqualified. But hey, I love it and no one is stopping me.

2) Continue my path on getting my Bachelor’s in English.

I know my mom wants me to quite school and work full time. But I want this Bachelor’s for me, not anyone else. I have always wanted to teach Middle Schoolers but I wouldn’t mind being a writer for some girly magazine either, or maybe one of those people who edits papers or something. I need that Bachelor’s degree and I am so close! There’s just some people who don’t think I need it. But I do need it!

3) Find a part time job.

I need to find a part time job. It would be nice to pay my parents a bit of money and also support myself by buying my own stuff too!

3) Get my Driver’s License.

This has been put off for way too long. I am terrified of it and love to walk and take public transportation but I need to do it, especially now that I am living in the suburbs.

4) Get my wisdom teeth extracted.

The date is set! Yes, I have heard horror stories and haven’t been able to sleep thinking about it, but I have to get it done otherwise my braces were pointless.

5) Go to Church more often.

I have been going to Church more than once a week lately and I love it. I just need to maintain this.

6) Eat less chocolate.

I don’t know if this is possible, but I can try.

7) Write more.

The fact that all Borders bookstores are gone really has affected my daily journaling. My emotions are everywhere if I do not write. This shouldn’t be a reason for me to stop writing. I do miss Borders though!

8) Stop swearing so much.

It’s unbecoming. Once I stopped working with kids, my mouth was just on vacation or something… “F* this” and “Sh*!” It was a sense of release somehow but it really needs to stop.

9) Continue to volunteer.

This past semester, I did a lot of volunteer work with Project Shine and tutoring students with English for a student success program. I did good considering one of the few students who saw me received in A in her class. It was very rewarding.

10) Love myself more.

This year, there was a lot of “fat” comments towards me. It hurts. I know I am not skinny and I know I am not fat. I did like myself the way I was, but my emotions about myself are up and down. Everyone is beautiful, including myself. Accepting myself is something I need to work on.

Happy New Year!


Group Projects and Why I Dislike It

Group projects. Maybe it is just this particular group that I was assigned with but it’s not that I do not like the people; It is more so I do not like the fact that my thoughts and suggestions are either marginalized and put aside or straight up get shut down. I often feel this way in some classes as well. Where my thoughts and ideas are not important and get ignored while someone says the same exact thing I said and gets the privilege of having their thoughts which are the same as mine written on the board.  Maybe it is my voice that makes people not take me seriously. I don’t know. But whatever it is, I do not like the after thoughts and feelings I have inside about myself.And it also can be frustrating that this is my favorite class, yet I can not reach my full potential in this final project because the group mates do not exactly favor my ideas.

So my group project is about the “Forgotten War” which is the Philippine-American War. Really, I love this topic. I find it interesting and want to research more on how it was forgotten and why. I suggested that part of our presentation have a  bit on how the US has influenced the Philippines and it’s traditions and cultures. They said that it was too broad. And one girl said, “What do you mean by that?” Um… How did the US influence the Philippines? That’s pretty understandable. But they specifically wanted to talk about the Philippine-American War and it’s time period which was ten or more years. They didn’t give a damn on how the Philippines was before this war happened and if anything changed after or since that war. Another girl even offended me by not knowing my name. My teacher calls my name out often and I sit in front of this person consistently and she does not know my name!? She may have very good vocabulary but she doesn’t seem very attentive. Especially, if we were all put in a group together and she didn’t care to see who the other group mates are. I am bothered that she knew the rest of our group members names but not mine. Singled out twice in one morning.

I believe that my suggestion is a great idea and can add more variety to the project. All we are listing is how and why it happened,  media coverage from both sides American and Philippines and we are showing some pictures of cartoons and what message is it trying to express.  Nothing at all on how the Philippines improved or didn’t improve. Instead of my suggestion, they suggested we get Filipinos’ reactions on the war. That to me is of course relevent but not as relevent as looking at the entire country as one and it’s affects from the war.

It’s Friday but it’s not looking like a very fun one for me.

Leggings = Possible Fashion Faux Pas

To those of you ladies reading this. Don’t take this the wrong way if you may be one of those who wear leggings on a regular basis. But I cannot keep this inside any longer. Leggings. You should not wear leggings in public unless you are wearing it with a sweater dress. What is a sweater dress? Easy, it is a sweater that is as long as a dress. In short, make sure you wear leggings with a shirt, sweater, whatever top that covers your derriere. I am a college student and am at school five times a week and I can not help but want to tell each and every girl who wears leggings inappropriately to put some real pants on. Believe me, more than half the girls at school wear leggings inappropriately.  You can seriously see through that thin material and you can see granny panties and it’s revolting. I used to work retail… not my favorite clothing store but even they had a rule that specifically said, “Leggings are not pants, do not wear leggings as if it is an actual pair of jeans, cargo pants, khakis or dress pants.” Really though, leggings are more like tights. So when you wear leggings with a top that does not cover your arse, remember it is basically wearing tights and stockings without a skirt. Do yourself a favor and wear a skirt over it. Better yet since it is Fall and Winter is just around the corner, keep yourself warm and put some pants over those disgusting leggings. Rant over.

Precious Knowledge

Imagine this…

You are a high school student. You never even liked school and thought the education system was somehow against you. College is nothing you really think about especially because it seems that people don’t think you can or should go to College. In Tucson, Arizona, there is a 50% dropout rate of Latino and Latina students.

Then suddenly, you meet this teacher who changes everything. You find yourself going to school everyday just because of this inspirational teacher. You can relate to a class and have this safe space where you are able to express yourself and your beliefs and opinions with no hard feelings against you. Then, you begin realizing who you are. You have better goals for yourself than ever before and you know that you are somebody. You are worth fighting for.

Precious Knowledge is more than an eye-opening movie. It’s empowering and emotional. The fact that Ethnic Studies is not part of American History is beyond crazy. We have been fighting for Civil Rights for a long time and because we are still fighting for it, is sad. In the state of Arizona, the State believes that “ethnic studies should be abolished” and Ethnic Studies is teaching students to hate. They accuse students who are taking Ethnic Studies to be racist… who new that learning more about their own culture is being a racist? If anything, Ethnic Studies helps students find out who they are and how their ancestors came to the United States. There are so much other benefits when taking Ethnic Studies. I myself am taking some Ethnic Studies classes and I just not learn about how my parents and grandparents and ancestors migrated here and what they had to go through, but I learn about the laws and rules and regulations and how they were treated or mistreated. I also learn a lot about myself and for once I feel connected to some history since I never really felt connected to U.S History. And thinking about what is going on now, I feel that in some States, we are not going forward, but backwards. If you see that kids are improving and the dropout rate is obviously decreasing and you see a sudden increase of students showing up to school and having an interest in education, why take something that precious away from them? Why? What were these students doing wrong when they were just trying to better themselves?

The Arizona government was having major issues and somehow think that Racial Minority groups are taking over the world. When one Senator came to visit an Ethnic Studies class, he believed that Ethnic Studies is not supportive of American History because there was no picture of Ben Franklin or the Founding Fathers. Instead, he saw pictures of beautiful people of color that can actually relate to other students. They accused the Raza program of having evil ideas and being distasteful. They also believe that students wearing brown shirts, bandanas and sunglasses arm in arm was life threatening. These students were not threatening anyone. It’s called Resistance. They are using resistance to protect their teachers, the future students, their families, values and culture. And ever since SB1108, you see how valuable Ethnic Studies really is. Students and teachers alike take it to heart that Culture and Ethnic Studies may never be taught again until we get it back. Kids and their teachers will go so far to protect Ethnic Studies and to keep teaching Ethnic Studies in their school that they will run 110 miles in 115 degrees weather, they will risk being threatened and even physically threatened, they will risk being sent to prison and they will risk living in a racist State. And anywhere else in the world where Ethnic Studies will be banned, I am sure students and teachers will do the same.

I feel honored to have watched Precious Knowledge and I am so glad that this movie was made to show people what is going on in certain parts of the world. It was so emotional that some audience members cried when they met the guest speaker who even tears every time she sees this movie. It was more than an eye-opener. It was empowering. This is a must-see movie for one race- the Human Race.

Imagine this…

You are a High School graduate. You are thankful to have had the best teachers and Ethnic Studies classes. Unfortunately, you know that your younger brothers, sisters, cousins and future children will have to struggle in school because classes that teach good morals, values and culture may not be taught. College may not be an option since the dropout rate for racial minorities is 50%. What would you do?